Addicted
by TrixieTrux
Summary: Bella is a vampire; Edward is human. Can she get over her fear of killing him long enough to let herself fallin love?
1. Chapter 1

_Twilight Belongs to Stephenie Meyer. _

_**Please Read!!!_

_I didn't give up on my other story, just having technical difficulties. I lost everything on my computer...so give me some time. _

Chapter 1- Almost

"All that blood Alice, I could have ruined everything." I exclaimed as she ushered me into my Mercedes, I was afraid I had blood on the back of my shirt, I didn't want to stain the leather seats. Alice could tell I was still a little frenzied and shoved me into the passenger side, and then climbed behind the wheel.

"I need to go hunting Alice, now." I pleaded. She nodded, and started down the highway away from campus. The trees were speeding past us at an alarming rate, Alice must have foreseen the urgency. I laid my head back on the rest, and closed my eyes.

"What are you thinking about?' Alice's voice rang through the silent car. I reached for the CD player, and flicked on my favorite CD. My favorite song flooded the car.

"How much I wanted to ravage him. Not just his blood Alice, his body. He has to be the most intriguing human I had ever met. In all my one hundred fifty years, I never had wanted to familiarize myself with a human, but I had seen flashes of it today when his body collided with mine outside of our class.

"Oh, I see. And?"

"I can't Alice, I just can't. He is human." I couldn't finish my sentence, I had never had the urge to have a relationship with someone before, let alone a human.

"He noticed my eyes, and how cold I was." I stated, I was in shock at myself.

"I know. I saw his next move before he made it, I cant believe he got up and tried to shake your hand." she was laughing, but I didn't find it humorous. I listened to the song, and smiled at the lyrics. I had nothing to compare to.

"I almost attacked him when he stuck his hand out at me. All that blood. God Alice. What am I going to do?" I begged. She stopped the car next to the trail, and we got out. It was really close to home but it was an emergency.

"You are going to go hunt, and then we will get you into clean clothes, and then we will figure this Edward out." she stated, she could steer me in the right direction. I closed my eyes, and took in a gulp of air. The scent of blood bombarded my senses, and I was off.

I was laying in the tall grass a while later when Alice came upon me. She had a few drops of blood on her shirt, but that was it. I, on the other hand had gone completely crazy and fed until I was sure there was no room left. My shirt was covered with blood, and I noticed Alice take in my appearance. She clicked her tongue at me.

"I cant take you anywhere look at that shirt, that was my favorite shirt." she yelled. I grinned at her, and patted the grass next to me. This is why she was my best friend, and sister. She was there for me, unconditionally. We laid in the grass until the sun went down, and then headed for the car. I drove this time, turning up the volume as soon as the power came on.

"Aren't you tired of this song yet?' Alice teased. I shook my head no at her, and closed my eyes as the first few notes of Saving Abels "Addicted" started to play.

"You don't even have sex, so why the love for this song?' she asked, I was a little offended.

"I'm sure Alice, you know maybe someday I will find someone. And then what, I'm going to get you all back for all the noisy nights." I told her, she was laughing so hard she was holding her stomach. We went our separate ways when we got home, our house was lit up from every room. The lights casting a warm glow on the ground below. Esme had ran her eyes over my clothes, and then Carlisle was holding her back when she went to follow me upstairs. I hoped that my family wouldn't see this as a mistake on my part, at least I didn't kill him. I sighed as I thought about those emerald eyes, his crazy hair. I wanted to reach up and curl my fingers into that mess.

'_They don't think you did anything wrong. Take a shower, and then we will talk.' _Alice's "voice" called out to me.

"Thanks Alice." I whispered, she could hear me. I got the water as warm as I could, and then climbed in. I don't know how long I was in there, but I knew I had to get out when the water started to turn cold. I dried my hair, thankful all the blood had come out of it, I laughed at myself. I hadn't made that big of a mess since I was a young vampire. Alice was there, she looked frantic.

"What.." I didn't have time, she was throwing clothes at me, and then shoved me into a chair to do my hair. I looked at her, my eyes meeting hers in the mirror and I heard it suddenly. A very different voice, but one I would recognize anywhere.

'_Dr Cullen has hot daughters….wait is that the chick I ran into this afternoon?'_

"No, I cant. What is he doing here?" I asked, I was furious that he would show up at my house. Although it seemed he had no idea I loved here.

"Carlisle is his advisor. He's in med school." Alice answered, I didn't have the strength to listen to her. I was blocking everything out. We headed downstairs, I heard voices coming from our fathers study.

"Bella, Alice in here please." He commanded. He smirked at me, and then threw a thought into my head.

'_this is the man' _I nodded my answer, and thought I saw Edwards eyebrows knit together in confusion. Had he noticed that? I have to be more careful. Alice was grinning, and then I peeked at her. A very vivid image of her and Jasper in the meadow where we had just spent our afternoon. She was keeping something from me. I gagged silently, and shoved my way out of the room.

"Bella, could you help Esme get dinner together?" Carlisle called out, I threw him a soft yes and listened as I headed down the stairs. I was silent as I helped my mother unpack the Mexican food from a local restaurant. I heard the sounds of footfalls and prepared myself for the intrusion. His scent hit me like a ton of bricks. I stopped breathing, and steadied myself with the kitchen counter.

"I'm not hungry." I blurted out, I was weak. But it was the truth, my body felt the fullest it had in a long time, I almost looked human when I had got out of the shower. Carlisle gave a me a stern look and I took a seat at the dinner table. I looked around at it, I palmed the surface. If I had been human, I would have left a fog on the surface. I hoped Edward hadn't noticed my experiment. I heard a very defined _'Did that just happen?' _and pulled my hand into my pocket. I met his eyes for a second, he was thinking, very loudly; he wanted to know what I was. I controlled myself long enough to play with the food, and then excused myself to my room. I was sitting on my bed, the one I had broken down and bought to just make myself sad trying to remember what sleep had been like; when there was a knock at the door. Figuring it was Alice, I told her to come in. I was facing the outside wall, watching the rain pelt the glass wall when his scent hit me again. I crinkled my nose, and sat up to face him. His thoughts hit me first, the thoughts of how much he wanted to know me.

"I'm sorry for running into you earlier. Are you sure I didn't hurt you?" I looked at him incredulously. He laughed a little.

"It felt like a hit a brick wall. How often do you work out?" he asked. I snorted, I haven't had to lift a single weight in over a hundred years. His emerald eyes met mine again, and he looked confused.

"You know, your eyes are very expressive. One minute they look almost black, and just now they looked almost honey colored." he blurted out. I scowled, and it was like you could feel the sudden change in the atmosphere. I am so stupid.

"Edward, please. Just leave." I told him. My voice surprised me by sounding so withdrawn. There was no way I could get any more wrapped up in him than I already was. There were emotions stirring within me that I hadn't felt in over a century.

"Please Bella, I just want to get to know you. You're keeping something from me, and I will figure it out someday. Cant we just be friends if you don't want me like that?" Well that was straight forward. Little did he know I wanted him more than I had ever wanted anything in either of my lives.

"No Edward, its better if were not. I'm not want you think." I told him, I turned over again, and waited for him to leave. I finally heard his footsteps as he turned for the door, and then I heard the door slam downstairs. Esme was at my side in a heartbeat. I was enjoying my silence, it was something I heard taught myself to do over time. She was pushing the hair out of my face, and It was the first time I wished for tears in nearly fifty years.


	2. Knowing

**Edward POV**

Chapter 2- Knowing

Three weeks and four days she had effectively ignored me. How could someone be so cold, and hateful. She really didn't like me. I had never had any problems getting a girl before, so why now? I would have liked to think that it was the challenge that was attracting me to her, but it wasn't. The moment I had seen her I was glued to her, like we were magnets coming together.

"Different?" I asked myself aloud, my roommate glanced over at me. Both of us being pre med students; neither of us had very large social lives. I rolled my eyes, and stood up from my laptop. Grabbing my coat I called out a bye to him, and I left the room. I wasn't for sure where I was going, but I had to get out of that dorm room. There was only one place I felt like going. Bella's house. I guess it should be more like Carlisle's house since she did nothing but ignore me. Everyday in our American Lit class she would immediately put her head phones on and i would watch as she turned the music up high.

"Hope he wont mind." I whispered as I started up the Volvo. My car, I loved it almost as much as I loved...

"Whoa. Stop right there Edward. She wont even talk to you." I chastised myself. I kept getting distracted as I wound through the streets of Seattle, and then on the desolate road to their secluded house. I had to turn the radio on loud to keep my eyes on the road. Damn her for making me so infatuated. I was still angry as I pulled up to the house, the lights hitting the ground softly. It was just starting to rain, the drops hitting the house quietly. I looked up at the room I knew was hers, and saw her peering down at me. She looked sad, withdrawn. She shut the curtain as I headed for the door. Alice was already there, her friendly face inviting me in. At least one of them was nice to me. Alice was cute, but taken. Very taken. Jasper looked as though he could snap me in half. And don't get me started on Emmett. He still scared me. Apparently there was another sister, well they were all adopted, but she never made an appearance.

"Edward, everything ok? I didn't think today was your meeting?" Esme asked as she took my coat. I shrugged.

"its not, but I had to get out of the room. I had to give myself a different atmosphere. Is Carlisle here?"

"No sweetie, he's on call tonight. Are you hungry?" She asked. I had to laugh at that. Even though I had eaten here many times already, it always shocked me when she asked. I had never seen them take more than a few bites of food when they fed me. I told her yes, and she was off to the kitchen. Alice was looking me, like she was mocking me.

"We all know why you really came over. She's upstairs, go talk to her." I heard a door slam from somewhere above me. I frowned, there was no way she heard that.

"Are you sure Alice? She doesn't seem to be very fond of me." I questioned. I didn't want to infringe on her at all. It would just make things worse.

"Yes, she does like you. She's just afraid. She has to work through it." She shoved me at the stairs, and I made my way to her room. The last door on the right. I heard soft music coming from the inside, and I also heard her moving around. Quickly. I knocked, hoping that she wouldn't ignore me. She answered quickly, and stood looking at me. Even though I pretty much towered over her small frame, there was a fierceness that I wouldn't even begin to compare to. She looked like her little body could handle anything.

"What are you doing here Edward? I told you it was better off this way."

"No, you told me that you weren't what I thought you were. Care to indulge me? Can I come in or are you going to make me stand in the hallway all night?" I pointed out to her. She stepped back without a sound, and let me walk past her. My arm brushed past her arm, I pulled mine back quickly at the feel of her frigid skin. She was turned away from me in an instant, her eyes downcast. I caught the look of shame on her face, and reached to turn her head my way. She jerked back before I could reach her. She crossed the room and sat, on the foot of her bed, and motioned for me to sit in her desk chair. Her laptop was cracked open, her program waiting for her when she returned. She was staring out the window when I allowed my eyes to find her form again. She had the light dimmed to low, making it appear she had been sleeping. There was a crack of lighting outside, making the room glow for an instant.

"Do you believe in fate?" Her voice cut through the silence like a clean blade. I relaxed into the chair. I was trying to understand her question, who cared if I believed in fate?

"I guess. Why?"

"Because sometimes life throws you curveballs and you just have to deal with fate. Please don't misinterpret. I do like you, I just cant be with you. There are things in my life, who I am that have forced me into this decision. It has nothing to do with you as a person. Its just to dangerous." she finished, her melodic voice stopping. I was watching her face as she had said every word. She seemed only half hearted about what she was saying.

"I'm sure about this. You wont change my mind." she said quietly. I gaped at her, that was the second time she had done that. Her head was tilted my way, her eyes on the floor.

"How…?" I couldn't finish my sentence, it wouldn't come out. I got an idea. I suddenly started thinking about how it would be to make love to her, her small body underneath mine. She couldn't see it anyway. I let my eyes slip shut, which was a total mistake on my part because I was going to get too into it. A small gasp made me open my eyes again. She was there, only inches away from me. Her eyes level with mine. They held hurt, lots of it.

"That's not fair Edward." she whispered. So she did see it. I don't know if she ever meant for me to know or not. So this is what she meant by different. She could read my mind, or was it just my thoughts.

"Bella…" I started. She got up, quicker than I ever thought possible for a human; and went to the furthest corner away from me.

"Get out Edward. You aren't supposed to know any of this." She buried her face in her hands, and slid down the wall. She was curled into herself as I approached. She didn't move as I though she would as I bent down to her. I grasped her hand, and tried not to jump when the cold hit my fingers. Her eyes met mine again, and I pulled her from her crouch. She jerked away as she stood, and pushed at me. Her small hands connecting with my chest, they knocked the wind from as she pushed.

"I said leave." she said acidly. My heart broke into a million pieces as I turned to leave, I stole a quick glance back at her. She was back in her spot at the foot of the bed; staring out the window. I rushed from the house, the pouring rain soaking me as I ran to my car. She was at her window staring at me as I looked up before I left. Lightening flashed again, making her skin glow as she stood; watching me. Thunder cracked through the sky, a deafening crash came at me. I glanced back at the house as I drove off. There was a tree down in front of the house, and a small form of a girl. Bella was standing in the soaking rain, watching me go.


	3. Tearing Down These Walls

Chapter 3- Tearing Down These Walls

I stared at the ruined front yard. Any second Esme was going to come outside and create a new hole in body because I destroyed her garden. I cringed as I heard the front door open, and then click shut. Hmm, no anger? Alice appeared in front of me. Her head bobbed back and forth as she looked from the massive oak and then back to me.

"Was that really necessary?" she questioned, her voice was only slightly mocking. I shrugged at her, and sighed.

"It made me feel better?" I acidly answered. She smiled a little.

"It did?"

"No" I heaved out another sigh and turned to go inside, but something stopped me before I could get to steps. Alice's little arms were wrapped around my arm, pulling me to the forest edge. I was trying to figure out her thoughts, but she was singing her favorite song; blocking me. She had been doing a lot of that lately.

"Why are you doing that so much; blocking me from your thoughts? You never do, you're one of the only ones that doesn't mind." I asked, my voice sounded like I was begging her to show me her thoughts.

"Because, if you knew how it would end; you would never go for it." I could tell she was forming an evil little plan in her head. I cautioned myself as I let her pull me towards the creek.

"Look Bella. We love you, especially me. You are my sister, but we are very tired of you being so depressed. Go hunting and then go see him." I started to protest.

"If you don't, I will drag you there by your pretty brown hair; got me?" she threatened. I turned towards the forest. Instantly I could hear the sounds of wildlife. I looked back at my sister who meant well.

"Do I need to hold your hand, you've been doing this longer than I have?" she teased. I smiled and took off. Running was one of my favorite things to do. When you have infinite time on your hands, it made me feel free. I left my thoughts at the forests edge, and began my hunt. Alice was still standing there when I returned an hour later. Freshly nourished, and once again a mess I grinned as I let her lead me into the house. Surprisingly Esme didn't yell or anything, she just silently let me know that I was responsible for cleaning up the mess.

"Not a problem Esme. I'll get it tomorrow." I answered. Alice forced me into the shower, and then shoved me into a chair when I was done. I impatiently tapped my foot as she played Bella Barbie. When my hair was finally curled to perfection, I stepped into the closet and chose my most favorite outfit. My Victoria's Secrets sweats and a hot pink hoodie. Living with Alice all these years has rubbed off. She nodded her approval at my choice and all but pushed me out the front door when I started to hesitate actually leaving the house.

"What if he wants answers Alice? I don't know what to tell him." I pleaded with her. She pursed her lips at me, and then focused on the tree behind me. I saw everything as it hit her. He did want answers, and I apparently gave them to him, and much more then I needed to. Her perfectly plucked eyebrow raised at me when she came back to reality.

"I will try not to give anything major away."

"Bella, if that's what it takes for you to be happy. Then so be it. He seems to be okay with it in the end. He'll accept it, if not I'll hunt him down." She answered. Her lips pulled into a smile as I turned to walk away from her.

"Just don't give any of the goods up!" she yelled as I reached my car. I heard Rosalie laughing as I slammed the door and turned the key.

"_Don't do anything I wouldn't do." _She thought as I backed out of the garage_. _Which when it came to her and Emmett, there wasn't much left when she said that. I was almost to his dorm when Alice began thinking for me again.

'_The rain is going to stop. Take him to the meadow. Don't forget a blanket.' _

I thought that maybe it would be to intimate a setting for the conversation we were about to have. I found myself staring at his dorm room door wondering how my feet had come all this way without my remembering. I silently prayed to myself I hadn't darted up the stairs forgetting I wasn't at home. That would be bad. I hesitated as I raised my hand to knock on the door. It opened before I had a chance, Edward stood looking at me; dripping wet with nothing but a towel around his waist. His eyes perked up when he took in my appearance.

"Get dressed, we're going for a drive." I wasn't going to let him get of this. He was confused, I got that thought first. And then he was wondering why I was so suddenly here, ready to talk.

"I know, if it makes you less wary I was forced into it. But on the bright side, we have to have this conversation." I answered. His roommate was there, reading a medical journal that Carlisle had read in two hours a few weeks back. He glanced at me, thinking about how I could possibly know what Edward had just been ranting about. I smiled, gave a little wave and then waited for Edward to be ready. "Are you just going to stand there? I have to get dressed." he pushed me out the door, it was amazing that I had let him. But secretly I just wanted him to touch me. I grinned to myself, letting him in wouldn't be so bad maybe. I zoned as Alice went into a vision, she was thinking it real hard for it to make it all this way. Edward and I, in the meadow watching the sunset. Wait, sunset that meant I would be sparkling; he knew and he was smiling at me. He was really going to be okay with this. Alice came to, but kept thinking real hard.

'_He's already decided to look past your differences and your past. He just wants you to let him in' _

I was still grinning when he opened the door and shut it behind him. He rolled his eyes a little and then led me out to the entrance. He started to go for his car, but I pulled him to mine. He stopped short, but then hurried up to open the door and climb in gently. I eyed him quietly, I was trying desperately hard to not read his thoughts. When he didn't speak, and then just sat looking at me I dove in; unable to resist.

'_And I thought my Volvo was sweet. Man she has great taste in cars. Backseat is nice and big.' _

If I could have blushed I would be a tomato this very moment. I breathed in an unneeded breath and put the car into drive. I felt him shift next to me, he was smug.

"Don't even think about. Its going to be a long time before you get me in that backseat." I finally spoke. The sound of my voice brought the awkwardness to an end. He was laughing, and I couldn't help it as my lips turned into a smile.

"Bella I'm a little confused. You have barely spoken two words to me in the past three weeks. And now here you are, appearing to be more than willing to talk to me. What's going on?" he asked. I looked at his confused face. His eyebrows were pulled into a frown but there was also a hint of happiness there too.

"Well Alice said she was sick of seeing me mope, and I just am finding it hard to resist you anymore. And since you already now a pretty big secret about me, there's only one other thing that we have to get past. I only hope that you can deal with this secret." I answered him, he was staring at me as I drove. I tried to keep it at a safe speed, not wanting to get him anxious already.

"So you can read my mind, how does that work?" he questioned. I was wondering why he was even talking. I let out a small sigh.

"I can only hear your thoughts that you have at that moment. You are a very strong thinker." I told him. He was still thinking about how it worked.

"Think something." I commanded. He turned his face a way, and looked deep in thought.

'_I wonder what her other big secret is. Can it really be that more than reading minds?' _

"Yes it is. In fact there was a book in your dorm room that holds all my secrets in it. It is the secret that makes me so dangerous to you." He looked very perplexed as I replied. He was lost, trying to think of all the books on his bookcase. I waited, he had already read it, I just needed him to remember it.

"The urban legends, you're a werewolf?" he asked. Oh come on, was he serious.

"Do I look like a werewolf?" He nodded no, and continued to recall the book. It took him the rest of the ride, which was only five more minutes, and still hadn't thought any thing different as I pulled him from the car, and then pulled the blanket out of the trunk. His eyes questioned me as I led him into the dark forest. He let me lead him to the clearing and then stopped as I laid out the blanket. The east side of the meadow broke off, and the ocean was lapping at the shore two hundred feet below. We sat on the blanket, close to the very edge of the cliff. He was a little scared.

"Don't worry, I'll save you. Have you thought of it yet?" I asked, he shook his head no. he was staring at his surroundings, taking in the beauty of the meadow. Suddenly it clicked for him. He knew, and I didn't tell him anything. Okay maybe a clue; or two.

"Say it." I demanded. He looked a little nervous as the word left his mouth.

"Vampire. The cold ones." I watched his face, tracking his reaction. He looked at me quickly, searching my face for answers. Apparently my face gave him all the confirmation he needed. It was quiet for the next half hour. Again I tried my hardest to not hear his thoughts, I was blocking it as best I could. He needed to work through this without me answering his thoughts. I just let him be.

"why are you so dangerous to me?' he blurted out. I raised my eyebrows at him, and thought of a way to say it without scaring him.

"Because your blood is like a siren to me. It calls to me. But at the same time, so do you. You are the only other creature that I have ever wanted to get to know. Besides my family." I answered. He took that in.

"I need to know you to. I don't care what you are." he stated. I smiled, and pulled him back down onto the blanket. He let me curl up to him with a sigh. He held me for what seemed like hours, well I guess it was hours. The sky began to lighten in the east, and I felt him begin to stir awake. I had noticed long ago that he had fallen asleep. He opened his eyes just as the sun broke through the overcast sky. He gasped as my skin began to sparkle, throwing the sun into rainbows around us. I smiled shyly at him, and he grinned. Reaching towards my face he pulled me close.

"Beautiful." he mumbled. His lips pressed gently to mine.


	4. Confessions

I do not own twilight characters. not mine.

Chapter 4- Confessions

"So how did you become…you know?" I asked her. I didn't know if I could say the word again. Yes, I had said it once before, but I had gotten used to the fact that the beautiful woman curled into my arms was not human at all. Her frigid skin was creating goose bumps on my body, but I didn't mind, she was snuggled up to me finally. She laughed a tinkling laugh.

"Edward, you can say the word. It doesn't offend me."

"I know, but I didn't want to treat you like you are different. Because it doesn't matter to me, and I wanted you to be held equal to me." I ranted. She smiled again, pressing her lips softly to mine.

"You're amazing. Well, I had just given birth to my first child. A son. It hadn't gone well, and I had to be taken to the hospital." she seemed to study my reaction. Bella had been married, and a mother to someone. When I didn't speak she continued.

"I got an infection, and never turned around from it. Carlisle happened to be my doctor. I begged him, and begged him that I was not ready to die. I had my son to raise" she was far away now, as if she was concentrating real hard on remembering the time.

"When I was in my final hours Carlisle confessed to me what he was. And I told him that I was not ready to die. He stole me away to his estate, where I awoke some days later in this new body. I was alone, all alone. I watched my son grow, and my husband remarry. That was the hardest. Leaving all that you know behind." her voice trailed off, she was done. I wasn't going to push for more details. She stood suddenly.

"Come on, we should go." she whispered, reaching for my hand. I followed her into the dense woods and held tightly to her hand as we made our way to her car. It didn't take us long to get to my dorms, and she waited quietly as I gathered myself to return to my normal, boring life. I was just reaching for the door handle when she spoke.

"Listen, were having a family night of sorts. Do you want to come?" she asked timidly. I wondered why she seemed so shy about it. She shook her hair into her face, something I noticed she did when she was nervous.

"Sure Bella. I would love to. Will everybody be there?" by everybody she knew what I meant. The guys still made me nervous every now and then. And now that I knew they were vampires, it didn't make it any easier.

"Yes, I believe Rosalie is going to make an appearance too. Do you want me to pick you up?"

"No, I can drive. That way I can stay as long as I want." I stated. She smiled at me, one of those shocking ones. Her perfect teeth bared to me, glistening bright white. I made a mental note to keep away from those. I waved her off, and headed for my room. Now that I was actually by myself, I could wonder freely. What would it be like to be inhuman? Did she enjoy it? Did she enjoy never aging, looking like a teenager forever?

"Hmmm." I mumbled. I opened the door to my room, it was empty. My roommate gone for now. I laid down, not bothering with clothes, and thought about things some more. Every day I got older, Bella never aged. She already looked only seventeen. How long could our relationship last if she never got older?

"What does she eat?" I asked myself aloud. Another question for her. I told myself to ask her all these later. I awoke later, the window gray with dusk. I sat up quickly, stunned I had slept so long.

"Man, you must have had a good night. You don't come back at all, and you just slept all day. Is she that great?" my roommate asked. I shrugged him off, hopefully I would start spending as much time with Bella as possible. He annoyed me. I headed quickly to the shower, and stood in there for too long as I let the hot water relax me. I ran my hands through my hair, it was pointless to try anyway; and headed for my car. This time when I pulled up, the garage was open, spilling bright light onto the drive. The downed tree was gone, the grass looked untouched. Had Bella done that? There was music coming from the cavernous garage as I headed in to the door. I saw a blonde, with legs up to her neck bent over the engine of Bellas' Mercedes. I stopped, wondering if I should introduce myself. As if she could hear my thoughts to, she straightened out and turned to me.

"You must be Edward. I'm Rosalie, nice to finally meet you." she stated, holding her hand out to me. I took it, wincing slightly at the pressure of her grip and her frigid skin. She let out a laugh.

"Sorry I forgot." I laughed with her.

"Oh my favorite part of this song." she reached for the controller at her side and cranked up the volume. Bella came bounding out the door, as if wanting to hear it to. She grabbed my hand, moving in a rhythm she could only pull off. Her beautiful body swaying to the beat of Nickel Backs' "Gotta Be Somebody". I watched, no stared would be more appropriate word for my behavior as she danced with Rose. I was ogling. I couldn't take my eyes off her body, her curves; all of it was perfect. The song finished, and she smiled brightly at me, taking my hand and leading me into the house. It was much nicer to see her in a good mood, it was like she lit up the whole house when she was happy.

"I love it when I make you happy." she whispered as we entered the kitchen. That was going to take some getting used to. I would have to watch my thoughts.

"You know, Alice is good at blocking me. Ask her for some tips." she told me. The whole family, minus Rose was assembled in the living room. The couches had been pushed back, and the coffee table held a scrabble board. I bet Bella wins every time.

"I have to sit this game out, I told you it was family night. What did you expect?" she stated, in response to my thoughts. I definitely did not expect scrabble.

"Hey you know, NickelBack is in town Saturday night, want to go?" Rose inquired as she joined the family. It was Friday night, where would they get tickets in such short notice.

"Get a suite Rose, that would awesome." Alice perked up. Rose pulled out her phone, and started talking quickly. She was off in less than a minute.

"Ok, we're good." how did she do that. Bella turned to me.

"It's easy when you have money, and know lots of people. And when you look that good, who wouldn't bend over backwards to get a chance." she told me, the family laughed. Carlisle seemed very at ease tonight. He took my coat, and then Esme asked if I wanted anything to eat. I had to hold back a laugh.

"I guess, is it alright that I eat in front of everybody?" the room went silent, and Bella was the first to giggle.

"Yes Edward, its fine if you eat. We'll eat later." I shivered at her words. She was looking up at me, gauging my reaction.

"I'm joking." she told me. There was a loud exhale of laughter, and I followed Esme into the pristine kitchen. After we had played scrabble, and an assortment of other board games, Alice winning all of course; Bella ushered me up to her room. Her family was just as normal as mine is, was I should say. I didn't know what she was so ashamed of. I guess that that would be a loose end I wouldn't have to tie up, I have no family.

"What happened to your family?" she asked suddenly. I stopped in my tracks, forgetting momentarily that she could read every thought I had. I was angry for a second, angry that she was prying.

"I'm sorry, this is why I don't talk a whole lot. I tend to answer things that people think. I didn't mean to. I'll try and stay out of head." she was frowning, she knew I had been angry.

"No, its ok. Not a whole lot of people know what happened to my parents. I'm just not used to having to explain it." she didn't say anything. As she sat on her bed, I sat next to her, turning myself to face her. I thought about my words hard, thinking solely of my mother as I chose my words.

"Oh Edward, I had no idea." well, that was easy. I could just think of what had happened, and not have to say anything. She flung her body to me, pulling me close. She held me forever, it seemed like forever anyway. Placing my hand on her hips, I gently pushed her away. Her eyes met mine, and I couldn't help but lean in for another kiss. She accepted, pulling me in closer. I wasn't sure how far to let this go. She said she was dangerous to me, but how so? I pulled away, I couldn't miss the look of rejection on her face.

"When you say you are dangerous to me, when…how…how far is to far?" I blurted out. She looked confused for a moment, her eyebrows pulling up when she realized what I was asking. She ducked her head, I waited for the blush but It never came. It never would.

"oh, I was pretty comfortable with that. I guess we'll have to test the waters." she answered, I gave a shrill laugh. I would have to admit to myself, I was a little scared of her. Not because I was scared of her hurting me, I was scared of all the new firsts.

"Edward, its been well…long enough since I've. You know. So I cant remember. We will just have to take it slow. Kissing seems to be fine, we'll figure out the rest." She calmed. I sucked in a deep breathe, still a little nervous. I brought her face to mine again, kissing her with more intensity this time. She allowed me to. I leaned her back, her head hitting the pillow below her, and made myself comfortable on top of her. She groaned, bringing her hands to my hair, pulling me closer. I licked her bottom lip, I was on the floor instantly. Shocked. Rejected. My ego was hurting, big time.

"Bella?" I whispered. I got up to my knees, looking over the top of the bed at her. She was curled into a tight ball, breathing heavily.

"Ok too much." I said to myself. She twitched, and turned to face me. Her eyes were black as pitch, fire burning in them.

"I'm sorry Edward. You have to move slowly, or at least let me catch up to where you are going." she exclaimed. I gave her a half smile. Well, at least I knew her boundaries.

"Its ok. Are you ok?" she nodded a yes, and pulled me back to the bed. I pulled the covers back, and let her place her head on my chest.

"I think I should ask you if you are ok though. Sorry I threw you. I just was surprised." she explained. I nodded, still in shock. We just laid there, talking.

"How old are you?" I blurted out suddenly. She turned away from me again. I waited.

"18."

"How long have you been 18?" I pressed. It was hard not to miss the look of fear on her face. Why is she scared?

"I hope it wont scare you off. I'm roughly 167 years old." she finally answered. I felt my mouth drop open. She laughed, making a show of closing it for me. I quickly gathered myself, trying not to make a big deal over her age.

"Can you…can we? Ever?" I asked, I sounded like such a typical guy. But she surprised me by laughing again.

"I suppose so. I don't see the danger of trying it. But if I kill you in the process, please forgive me." the sarcasm was dripping from every word. At least she said we could try.

"Would you ever make me a vampire?" I whispered. My voice was serious, there was nothing in this life I was tied to. I had already fell for her so hard, I wouldn't care if I gave up everything.

"You don't know what you're saying, or thinking for that matter." but I did know. She looked at me for an immeasurable amount of time. Years of loneliness, and hurt were harbored there.

"I do Bella, I fell for you the moment I saw you. That day before class. I knew at that moment that I wanted to be with you. I love you. I'm so in love with you it hurts." I said, it sounded like I was pleading with her. She was quiet for a long time after that, I was frustrated. She just didn't know.

"I do know. I love you too."


	5. changes

I had to change my email and everything, so my new name is trixietrux.


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